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As an older gentleman that well understands the part about satisfying your partner, I don't think I have ever in nearly 60 years had a woman tell me what gave her pleasure; it has always been hit or miss and hope for some positive response.
It seems that many people are incapable of sharing their sexual likes and desires with a partner.
I don't know if it is their upbringing or their fear of either offending or being harshly judged for their desires that is the problem!! But none of us are properly educated in this area, for many it's taboo or awkward and embarrassing to freely talk about. From the 60s onwards, which is not a long time, especially not in comparison to the thousands of years of sex being a 1-way street. It boils down to communication on both parts and both taking an interest in what the other desires, wants, and needs.
Plus, many women have experienced men not giving a toss, and many have still been raised with the belief that "woman has to please man", meaning why tell him what she wants? Setting the ego aside long enough to listen to a woman's desire and taking the time to learn is very necessary and often the problem when it comes to men.
Those questions are very personal and it is something that your partner should express when they are comfortable; that is like asking someone if they are gay or lesbian.
When was the last time you were in bed and asked your partner if they were gay or bi? As an older gentleman that well understands the part about satisfying your partner, I don't think I have ever in nearly 60 years had a woman tell me what gave her pleasure; it has always been hit or miss and hope for some positive response.
Much goes wrong there, as when a couple is in a relationship for some time usually routine sets in.It's a trend these days to state in capitals that man AND woman have to take care of such things.But in the arena of sex it still IS woman who does most of the pleasing and gets pleased less.If she'd be with a man who would appreciate her and treat her right she likely WOULD get wet again even.But it's still common practice to blame woman, and to even shun her if it doesn't work anymore, blame her for him not getting hard anymore and so on. Statements like, "Both man AND woman who have to satisfy the other! (NOT meant to attack the person who happened to say this in this thread btw, just using it as an example.) When listening to and talking with women you hear the same general thing: it's mostly about the man, he doesn't know how to please her, he doesn't make an effort to please her. The working up, the wooing, the seduction, the FINESSE mostly.