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And people like me who had deliberately chosen to marry outside of the will of God, were regarded and treated as carnal, worldly, second-class Christians. Ive changed names in this webpage so I can give you the plain unvarnished truth, without exaggeration and without concealing my failings.No matter how true that was where I was concerned, I cannot remember ONE speaker or writer offering a word of comfort. Even now my stomach turns at the thought of the sweet smiling faces on the back covers. This is because I long to spare other Christian women the sadness and distress, the disillusionment and depression that I went through for almost 40 years, because I made the wrong choice.And stick around for all 10 posts in our 10-part Dating Q&A series!Additional Resources: Are you single and ready for next steps in your love-life?Check out Debra Fileta is a Professional Counselor, speaker, and author of the book True Love Dates: Your Indispensable Guide to Finding the Love of Your Life as well as the 21-Days To Jump Start Your Love-Life Program, where she writes candidly about dating, relationships, and how to find true love.You may also recognize her voice from her 100 articles at Relevant Magazine or Crosswalk.com!
Yet, with the men to women ratio in Christian circles being what it is (almost always being more single women than men) sometimes I feel that this same problem presents itself within the church culture as well.
I’ve heard these question countless times and have even been the one asking the question once upon a time.
In Christian circles, it’s not uncommon to hear the women complaining that the men in their church just aren’t stepping up and initiating a relationship!
I think part of the problem in the illusion of choice is that when presented with so many decisions to make, one often ends up not making any decisions at all. It’s as though we’re hoping that by not making a choice, somehow a choice will magically be made for us.
We tend to freeze, to stall, to wait, and to postpone decision making out of fear of making the wrong choice. I personally know plenty of Christian men who have fallen into that trap, rejecting the bright, godly, amazing women God has put in front of their eyes out of fear of missing out on something or someone that might not even exist.